Monday, June 16, 2008

Overheard on a Monday... Returns...

The following are actual words and sentences that I overheard on a Monday morning while sitting in my cubicle minding my own business. I typed it and laughed... or maybe banged my head on my desk...

"Do they use cell phones in Dalai Lama-land?"

"If you use one you become a Tibetan monk."

On managing and the fact that a large amount of managers are "senior";

"Nokia...Let everyone go over the age of 35. Look at them. They know stuff."

"Finding a manager is like flying a plane – we’re all qualified but someone has to fly it"

"What if a clerk has competencies to manage? Can they?"

"These [management] tests are so hard, no human could pass them… just aliens."

"That guy (not me) was not smart, he was a phony with fancy cowboy shoes. He was a newbie… talked a lot to confuse people. Didn’t know that much. Or maybe that was just my opinion."

On it being a Monday:
"It’s Monday morning what do you expect…"

"I'm firing on all pistons"

"Did someone tell you that? I can guess too…"

Person A, "I’m in-competent”
Person B, "No! You’re competently deficient"
Both, "HA HA HA HA HA "
Me, Bang, bang, bang... That is the sound of my head hitting the desk

On politics...
"Have you seen the Conservatives ads against the Liberals carbon tax? They are paying taxpayers dollars to attack a policy that doesn’t even make the Conservatives look bad. It’s that Mulroney thing... He refuses to go talk about the slush fund Schreiber thing. It’s a Mulroney Scam. It’s like the Liberal Scam of giving money to friends. I hate the Liberals for all the money they gave the Quebec people to stay in Canada.

On gasoline...
Person A, "Gas is $1.35…"
Person B, "What… a barrel?"
Person B, "I just lost 3 years worth of a pay increase coming to work today."

... and so my day begins... Who couldn't have a great Monday after 2 hours of that...


LD said...

Oh man. At least you can write them down.
I spent my Monday in the Passport office. Talk about bizarre. I should have brought a pen!

ourlittlefunnybunny said...

This could be the only reason why I go to work.

Urban Daddy said...

Laural - or a mini tape recorder. :)

Gabriella - You really need to hear them... It's unbelievable.